After doing some cathartic soul searching and reading, a eureka emotional moment dawned on my spirit. I was always intrigued why UJ annoyed me so much. Trust, there are many things I dislike about him but may be able to overlook wasn't it for the fact that I realized that he's trying to change me into the package he perceived I was or wants me to be. I know he's physically attracted to me but in many of our interactions he brings up that I need to calm down or do this or that. He wants me to fit this picture HE has of the "perfect girl" he wants. So, all this nonsense doesn't concern me as much as it concerns his emotional needs and disconnect from reality. As I've said before, you CANNOT change a person. This is a task best left for the Divine and maybe the people who bore/took care of this person. Cause Lord knows, I ain't got time for that anymore. Thanks Daddy! (read Dating 301 post). This realization about UJ's emotional disconnect brought much peace to my soul because he just bothered me and I didn't know why. It irked me so much to the point of just wanting to squash him emotionally. I guess it's ingrained in the human spirit that we do not want to changed but accepted moreso lovingly understood and appreciated for the quirks that makes us..us and not someone else.
So UJ, I have a message for you. You like an illusion of me, a figment you've created but not what I am.You need to take some time and realize that this person doesn't exist and abandon ship on whatever type of lame "strategy" you were trying to concoct. Leave it alone...let it die..PLEASE, I BEG OF YOU! Because it irks this girl you're trying to "go after" and causes you much more discouragement than if you took the time to see that the one for you is not me.
It's ok, I've been there but I'm learning to let go and let God bring into my life the man who is what my spirit has been desiring. Because we (that man and I) are cut of the same cloth but YOU happen to be of a different textile.
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