Idiots R us

As I was contemplating what to write about ending my bloggeriatus, I remembered one of my last text convo's with a "guyfriend" and I was more than inspired to go off on no-good idiots that call themselves men. No, I'm not bitter woman walking around wanting to chop off men's numchucks or suddenly want to start shopping in my "department" bashing the other department for their lack of "insert reason for turning lesbian because of a man here". No..no...no...I'm just sick and tired of dealing with men who haven't left their boy tendencies in kindergarten with their powerranger sheets.

Exhibit A: Lets call him Ugly Joe Archetype
He's a nice guy, he's helped me while I was in some difficult situations, seems to treat women with reasonable amount of respect. DEFINITELY not a looker, style needs some upgrading (jeans from '98 and an free promo t-shirt does NOT constitute evening wear!) but has manners. So what irks the ISH out of me with him? He asks me on an evening "out" a date w/o calling it bc he had to BS his way through giving me reasons why I should go. Then during the whole time he's like "Oh, I'd be a good influence on you, I can tell your friends this, or yeah I can balance you out". I'm like who ARE YOU to infer that I want my ways changed or need your help to explain my friends who've been my "roaddogs" (as I call them) my ways? (Can you tell I'm Super Independent?) The reason they ARE my friends are because they like what I am! He kept "saying things" without actually "saying it" that after awhile I said "You know what I HATE in men? That they can't be upfront of what they want! If you like a girl tell her and either you'll get reciprocated or get SHOT DOWN LIKE A MAN!". Well, I thought that was the end of that, but oh no my friends. Even, after I gave him the "Friends" line, he persisted. Some of my best friends noticed it and one of them remarked "girl, I think he's trying to wear you out until you give in". HECK NAW, because after last night's text convo I'm DONE! I injured my back badly yesterday and he sent me a text saying "hey, did you go bullriding w/o inviting me..wink wink?" and then proceeding to come up with "funny" ways that I pulled my back. FUNNY WAYS??!! HOW IS PULLING YOUR BACK FUNNY?!! Then being like..don't be so uptight..you'll be fine as I spent my morning BAWLING my eyes out and INCAPACITATED by EXCRUCIATING PAIN! Everything was out of whack; I was dizzy, nauseous, and unable to walk or sit much. I just had to sleep it off and pop pills like it was going out of style. If I didn't wake up a bit better today, my next trip would've been the hospital and I'm still considering going to the chiropractor. His insensitivity and constant sly "come-ons" are irritating the MESS out of me! I let him know that his comments were offensive to me and he apologized but I'm just tired of him right now. Exhibit A showed me that I really have little patience for men who haven't upgraded their game past throwing rocks at girls they like. Sorry boys, girls grow up into WOMEN-- ACT ACCORDINGLY!

NEXT WEEK: Bum-rider Sam

Friendly Disclaimer: UJ if you read this-Sorry, I like you as a person it's your "game" I can't stand.