Single & Prosperous!

I’m cracking up at the Blogosphere as of late. Let me specify, the Black blogosphere. From diatribes on media hype on the single black women pandemonium to some sticking up the proverbial middle finger to the world. The  consensus is media needs to stay out of our love lives and Steve Harvey is of the devil. Hahahhah, to the last one. Look, I’m not going to hammer further on a coffin that’s been pounded to ash twice turned over to look for scraps. No mam, it is what it is but I do want to give a real woman’s experience out there in “single black womanland”.

-Saturday
What an akward yet funny day. It was one my friend’s birthday and we celebrated by hitting up an exotic eatery with seriously bad eighties elevator music. Still puzzled at their music connection to their foreign cuisine *smh* but this is beside the point. What is important is the fact that someone I had gone out with and have been put in connubiality without my knowledge was also there. Mr X.’s face lit up when he saw me and I cringed inside. No worries though, I followed my friend’s advice and made small talk with the group. Unbeknownst to me, conspiracies were being concocted. During the night much “personal space” was given to Mr X and I to commune. 


The only reason I had given him a shot was because his friends nearly begged me to accept his offer of assignation. On paper he was all that I could've asked for. He’s a Harvard-law grad, did his undergrad at VanderBilt, is a prestigious lawyer in my city, and from what I heard—his bank account isn’t too shabby either. But I wasn't really impressed by his social skills. I TOTALLY Agree with the song “Can’t buy me love”. It’s not the content of someone’s achievements but the content of his character that will make you fall in love (Lesson Learned). He was sweet and accommodating however there wasn’t a “connection”. Saturday solidified my assessment even more. It’s just not there. Even after his best friend’s girlfriend EMBARRASINGLY asked at the table how “we” are doing. Missed the memo on our “we-ness” and I retorted smartly that she’d have to ask him that. The topic was dead (to me). 


The end of the night came and he was very intent on letting me know he wanted to keep exploring the possibilities. Politely, I informed him I had already indicated that he was more than welcome to join me on Friday for dinner &jazz. It will be in a group setting but “Oh well”. However, he made sure he wanted to hang out besides that. I feel bad, I don’t like breaking people’s expectations (with people I refer to nice men). But I’ll try to do it as gently as possible.



So all this to say—black women are still dating and have great prospects. Forget all the negative reports. CNN/WashPost/ABC just concocted some women’s conundrum into a national epidemic for the sake of ratings/adspace money/whatever.


Second of all, I need to visit the watering holes again to be in the company of great men. Maybe I’ll meet another cool educated brother w/o an Ivy-League and all the hoopla of zeros in his bank. No need, all I appreciate is a good intelligent brother who pursues a woman and is able to provide in due timing. I’m glad I went through the experience with Mr.X to be woken up out of the silly delusion of “I needs the money, the cars, the social status, and Obama on my speed dial” to have a good man. A good man is just a man who has integrity. He pursues his goals with full passion but also knows how to recognize and treat a good woman.



Signing off,



Ms. Island Gal