Sassy Facts

I thought it'd be fun to do some facts about me! 

Facts about Christie aka Sassy Island Gal -(there's a reason for that nickname as you'll see)


1. I am a PROUD Dutch-Caribbean Island gal- I don't pretend to be anything else. It's been quite a journey to understand the ethnic groups within this wonderfully complex society called America. I enjoy it even when I criticize it at times. I've got mad appreciation for being here. I have a ball and have met some of the most incredible generous people.
2. I am a NON-BULLCRAP person. Please do not crap on my patience with lies, excuses, or insincere niceties. Give it to me straight. If you don't like me, or you feel I offended you, or whatnot- tell it to me straight (which maybe you can tell from my posts). I respect straight-talkers the most. These type of people are my closest friends. I just feel if you can't tell me something to my face that you're straight up shady bc God knows how you're dogging me behind my back then smiling in my face. So cut the bs and get to the heart- I connect to that so strong. It really touches me deeply that you choose to be vulnerable. I'm not judging so definitely want to hear the uncut version instead of what you gloss over which leads to my next fact.
3. I love people with deep life stories.You could've been a hustler, a former lady of the corner, whatnot but honestly I appreciate people who proudly say- I had my days but I'm restored now or am working on it. They walk with their heads high because they know their worth regardless of what people say to them.
4. If I can help you in anyway- definitely- I will help you even if it is to my detriment at times. I care deeply for people and I just could've met them. God & people have shown me such kindness- I have no reason to be stingy with the love I've been blessed to have in my life.
5. I run with a lot of people. I have different groups of friends and I don't like people who get all possessive making requirements for me to stay within a type of circle. I let go and let flow. I've survived without anyone in my life so as important as people are in my life- I can survive without. The only being I can't survive without is God. #thatsall. Play your position and if you don't like it- keep it moving.
6. I KEEP it moving! I don't stay down long. I PUSH FORWARD. Perseverance is one of the crucial keys of life. Mistakes are only final when you give up. Failures are the mother of reinvention. Reinvention the mother of Success!! 
7. I don't define success & happiness by what I have or someone has. Beautiful moments just tickle my spirit to its deepest core. I thrive off that- touching someone, being touched by someone, or just a serene moment reminding me of something greater. It may be a smile returned by a stranger, a random act of kindness, a ray of sunshine, getting Snickers from a friend, someone remembering me- it all adds to my joy. Money can't buy me nothing of significant worth.
8. LOVE LOVE LOVE Fashion! Harper's and Glamour subscriber! When the designers unleash their collections- you best believe I'll be going through pictures to find the next trends, and how I will apply it to my personal style. I don't believe in following a trend but creating & adding to your style.
9. I love a good *clean* joke, witticisms, and  friendly intense banter with friends!
10. The most attractive attribute I like out of men is a holistic maturity. A man who takes responsibility for his successes and mistakes. If he can hold intelligent & honest conversation - that's major for me. Throw in a beautiful blazer, well-fitting slacks, beautiful tie, and a sensuous after-shave/cologne- I'm out lol.
11. I LOVE to GO out and BE out! I'm not a clubber but I love to go to events with fun friends. Exploring the city and what's going on. Gala's, party's, plays, outdoor concerts, kayaking trips, nature walks, bbq's, beach trips etc. Staying home on the weekends for me is cruel and unusual punishment!! Really, I drive myself nuts staying home during that time.
12. Which goes hand in hand with this fact. I was made for CITY LIFE. I know crazy right?? I'm from a teeny weeny island but I love the city. I'm pushing to move inside the city aka DC downtown this August. Love the buzz.
13. I have no desire to be married right now. I wonder sometimes if there's something maybe off with me since I see a lot of people I went to college with getting married but that just makes me more apprehensive (hope they have good prenups). However, I do want to be married in a couple of years but I'm not pressed (yet). Guess when you have a fabulous single life, I really don't see why I NEED to FEEN to be married. I'm not scared to be alone.
14. Even when I get married- I don't really see me doing the housewife thing. I'll be dedicated to my children but it will be in a modern way. I'm a non-traditionalist (if you can't tell!) so yeah- I want to take em all over the world so they know that they are HIGHLY blessed & FAVORED to be borne in the society that they are. I actually might do a type of half in school, half some type of satellite homeschool thing so that they can experience their textbooks. I just really want them to gain LIFE EXPERIENCE and hopefully that will help to mature well.
15. I love to be creative! I love to dance- my room is my favorite dance floor! I love my curly fro- SO HAPPY I went natural!


I love to step to my own beat but I love company on my way Heavenbound.


KEEP MOVING FORWARD!


P.S to my friends: feel free to add in ;-)

Hurr...

What is it about cliches about what women are supposed to be or do that bothers me so much though rings so true? It is a true fact that if a woman doesn't "girly" herself up, that she probably won't get as much male attention. What is it that instantly magnetizes a man when a woman lets down her hair and long? Throw a ribbon on it and they're practically "cooing" at you, emulating their best primal prince charming behavior.I've seen this happen so many times. I go to the establishment that hands out the dollas in exchange for my "slave" labor and am in "career woman" mode. Men acknowledge you, they may be nice, or courteous but chivalry gasps for its last breaths in the background, lol. Now, if I come in with my tresses luxurious and silky--ooo..the chivalrous attitudes, the shy smiles, winks and so forth. The ole men will dust off their old lines as rickety as their walking canes, the young will try to spit game in the fail leagues of Soulja boy, and the dapper- well the dapper bring the compliments like sensuous chocolate fondue immersing you in their yummy goodness. MMmm...licking fingers..*looks around & pulls back into composure* LOL.

Well, I saw this post that I never finished from months ago. Funny, I've learned that some attributes are just plain irresistible to men among them like nice hair. It's so true, it your flipping crown, be it you bought it from that crummy Asian store next to that shady 7/11 or you be swishing Pantene style in your own natural crown. It's just how the male-female dynamic goes. We can try to dissect it, theorize it, intellectualize it but it just works that way. Hilarity is you'll see some man popping a vein about some theory yet some woman walk past him, and his eyes near fall out of its socket. HHahhahah...just my observation. I don't knock it anymore- just learned to harness the power of the knowledge of what is attractive to the other sex. It varies with each person but confidence is key. You as a woman are a beautiful queen even if there isn't a king or prince to appreciate it yet that doesn't detract from your royalty. Revel in your own beauty- and admirers will come! :-)


Toodles!

Mentally Honest

Fellow Tweeters have been spreading awareness that May is Mental Health month. Within me stirred yet I remained quiet.. It's humbling to admit in front of everyone that I have battled with mental issues in my family and with myself. My grandmother had Schizophrenia and lapsed every three to six months. My mom battled cyclical depression. My other grandmother battled Alzheimer's. My aunts have had serious bouts with mental disease landing one in the hospital getting her stomach pumped. I grew up visiting my grandmother in the Hospital or forcing my mom to eat or drink something while she shut herself in the dark. She'd weep with such fervor and blame everything on everyone and everything. You know how hard it is to have  the one who birthed you crying so hard that she's clutching her heart (suffering from heart palpitations) blaming you for her current state.

Now, many of you might think it would have driven me crazy and into rebellion. It didn't. My sympathies and love for her is deep. She had gone through so much as a child- she was the Mother when my grandmother lapsed. As she did, I'd take care of the family when she would lapse for weeks on end shutting herself in the room. I'd make breakfast for my dad, made sandwiches for my little sister and I, and cook lunch/dinner. Having gone through that with close family members made me mature very quickly in mind. I VOWED to never be the victim and to seek to be happy. I knew the triggers. I knew what it took to get you down spiraling out of control. It took one toxic thought coupled with some hard situations to knock the best off their sanity. I thanked God for keeping me sane but unbeknown to me I was having my own issues.

Round my teenage years, my thoughts would turn very dark during certain times. Suicide would be on the forefront of my mind but I never went through with it because so many people "depended" on me. Puberty was rough. Peer pressure and teasing by friends and "well-meaning" family made me pick myself apart. However, I had to remain the "strong" one or else I felt things would cave in. My parents were so proud that out of all their daughters I was a testament of "happiness" through all. My mom always told me how she admired my resilient joy in all things. As much as I appreciated her sentiment, it drove me hard when I did go through depression moments. "Everyone" knew me as "Happy Christie". And my discontent would seriously alienate a lot of people.

Sweet seventeen happened or better said sour. I moved to another island to finish school. I lived in host homes and God knows I went through some terrible things. THIS is when I realized my clear predisposition for deep depression. I starved myself- I shut myself in a room in the dark- developed compulsions- sometimes wouldn't shower for days -my room was a COMPLETE mess- Pesks took residence and I could care less -Thoughts of death were constant & bitterness enveloped my tender heart.

Finally it became apparent that something was wrong with me to the outside world. My parents understood and it pained them a lot. It helped them face their own demons honestly.

Then I moved to the United States. I was SO EXCITED! The transition was so much easier and fun. However, repressed emotions resurfaced at simple thing. One night, something happened, and I tried to explain to my roommate why it bothered me so much. I started sobbing so hard my tongue paralyzed. My mind was numb with pain. My second nervous breakdown happened. My roommate having been diagnosed with mental disorder herself knew what was going on. She gave me one of the BEST advice I've gotten so far regarding mental health. She told me " Christie, release all those people who have hurt you, release them. All it's doing is making you sick and they're probably going along fine." I was instructed to make a list and that FORCED me to reconcile hard things that happened in my past. From abandonment issues, to low self-esteem issues, to rejection from people I treasured the most. I had to acknowledge that I didn't deserve all the pain. I was not the cause. I was not responsible for someone I knew suicide. She decided to end her life, it was her choice.

It's been quite a journey and I've gone from a compartmentalized view of myself to being holistically me. The Christie that you see today is a product of growth, release, and forgiveness. Through all the counsel and support- I've learned to be keenly aware of when I'm going "down". I know now when the elevator of my mind is chiming "going down". I know when I'm in that state that I have to surround myself with certain people, music, thoughts.

I learned to change my perspective on life. There's something innate in us that rejects pain, blames it on people, God, ourselves. We want perfection but this world isn't perfect. My journey has taught me to reconcile my pain with my beliefs. God didn't promise us a perfect life on this earth- that's what the afterlife is for. What He does say is to confess all your anguish, pain, happiness, sadness to Him honestly. God isn't hurt by our questioning and accusations. He understand we're limited creatures-lol. Look, I still have my yelling sessions at God, life, and what not. People know now that I'm 95% happy but that 5% can be intense but it's ok- perspective changes anything.

It says in the Christian Bible " Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven". I take solace in that.

My journey has taught me so much compassion for people. Mental ailing isn't something to make fun of but acknowledge. If you don't understand what someone is going through- then just hug them, let them know you love them- you care. Don't disparage them because they keep relapsing. It's a battle and victory is on the other side. For some- it's a lifelong journey. Some are delivered from it. Deliverance to me is KNOWING when you are going down and doing what you're supposed to do. Seek to be with people, FIGHT against your inwards notions to Isolate. I seek outside perspective. It always comes to me.

This is why I'm so joyful. I HAVE OVERCOME. I overcome constantly by staying hopeful despite life's stresses & triggers! Joy is one thought away and so is victory.

Change your perspective- Change your life.

Much love,
Christie

Highway to a Husband *Dear Jesus help this woman*

Julia Yarbrough, a succesful Miami news anchor, decided to quit her well-paying job along with her BFF (how did she not talk her out of this) to go on a nationwide search for her husband. *Drops plate in ten thousand pieces- crickets stop chirping, even Richard Simmons is confused out of his leotards*


What the mess? How is this a good idea? The authors who first reported the story at www.eurthisnthat.com also sounded confused and highly skeptical.

“I don’t know if anyone told Julia Yarbrough, but today’s men really don’t find unemployed women anymore attractive than women find unemployed men attractive. But, nonetheless, she took off with her BFF, Silva Harapetian, to find a man Another flag! She not only has a girlfriend to bounce all his faults off once she goes to interview said potential mate, but she’s bringing her along for the ride. “

Yes, not only does she quit her job in a RECESSION, you take your friend to confuse you even more on your quest for a man. Look, it's hard for me not to be critical. This reeks of bad idea number 1,004,678,907 right after Chest Hair toupe *shudder*. Last time I checked with guys- they don't think women who subscribe to the“desperado crew” philosophy are cute & sexy. A certain ora surrounds a woman who is trolling for her next target to wrangle into holy connubiality. It's just not attractive. Second of all, the more my guyfriends let me peer in their brains the more I realize I know shiznits about men. So bringing your frenemy best girlfriend as your filter is just a major #FAIL in the leagues of Justin Bieber's awful haircut.I'm sure she will have a hell of time patrolling America. Lots of stories (or not) for the future grambabies if she can find a man first- Lord let me stop.

She gets brownie points for blatantly ignoring Steve Harvey, Jimmi Izrael (the originator of all evil) and Hill Harper. She believes love is out there for her and is passionately pursuing it. Plus she is not limiting herself to the black dating pool. Kudos to her for not staying comfortable. I'm a big proponent of interracial dating because the babies are so daggone cute (shallow- I know). Miss Lady is taking an unusual route to find her piece of happiness. Yes, it's crazy to me but after reading her "passionate" plea - I could maybe see where she's coming from *yea..tried..mind hurts*


Julia's website“Highway to a Husband” offers these nuggets into her crazy brain

"My name is Julia and I'm single. I have had an amazing and exciting career (22 years in the TV news biz), awesome travels, excellent friends and amazing adventures. But even with all that, there’s still something missing: a solid and loving relationship. I've tried everything I can think of - set-ups from friends, blind dates, on-line dating services.... still - NOTHING! (Maybe it's you -Julia)
I’m not quite sure who my husband is, but I know you’re not sitting at home waiting for life to come to you. You’re out following your passions and the only way for me to meet you is if I do the same."

Basically hunting the poor man down and stalking him to the alter. Ok, I'm done!


Good luck to you Julia. I wouldn't do it. I'm more of a traditionalist. The local waters have provided me with much entertainment. But don't let my "hate" knock your "hustle".
You all know what I think about this. What do you think? Would you do it?